What we did today

This morning I got the kids dressed and fed and we headed over to our local library for story time. I was so looking forward to a sweet time listening to books with my children cuddled up around me. I should know better than to look forward to something by now. My normally sweet children have been abducted by aliens and I'm not sure when I'll get them back. But these pod people we've been left with are OUT OF CONTROL.

We've been to story time before with much success. It has been a few months though and I couldn't wait to get back into going because Emma has gotten to where she really loves books. Apparently, she only likes books in the comfort of her own home.

We got to the library and got the kids settled in on their carpet squares and waited for the librarian to come on down. As soon as she started reading the first book, Emma took off towards the stage the librarian was sitting on and climbed up to the top step where there were all of these stuffed animals laying around. She picked one up, giggled and brought it back down to where we were sitting. No big deal. Kind of cute.

The librarian continued to read. Emma continued to run to the stage, climb the stairs behind the lady and pick up stuffed animals. I decided she was being very distracting. So I went after her and pulled her off the stage and told her she had to sit with us. Emma said "NO, NO, NO, NO!" So I let her go.

Jake decided he needed a stuffed animal too. He started whining about it. Jake's whining is sort of like nails on a chalkboard. It just gets to you. It makes you grind your teeth after awhile. I told him to sit still until the story was over. Emma ran back to the stage and picked up the very stuffed animal that Jake wanted and threw it down on the ground almost pelting the librarian in the head.

It was on. I picked her up and told them both that we were leaving. Mind you, the librarian hadn't even finished the first story yet. Jake went berserk. He was screaming at me that HE DID NOT WANT TO LEAVE! The other mama's were averting their eyes, trying not to look at me. I'm sure they were judging me and thanking God that they have sweet, perfect, well behaved children.

I had to drag Jake out of the library while he had a full on fit. He was screaming all the way out and flailing his arms about while stomping his feet (actually it was his entire legs stomping). He looked like a toy soldier on crack. Or too much caffeine. Or too much Halloween candy. I'm just saying his arms and legs were moving so fast you couldn't even see them.

We made it outside and I sat them both down on a bench to calm down. I explained to Jake that we had to leave because sister was not behaving and that he was being ugly with a capital "UG". So, he hit me and told me it wasn't fair. Right in front of two men who were doing some landscaping work. I told him that it wasn't fair that we had witnesses at that moment. Not really. But I thought it.

So, we left the library. But I still had to go to WalMart to pick up some stuff for dinner. I threatened them with bodily harm if they didn't behave. Then I threatened them with the with holding of Halloween candy. They weren't perfect, but we did make it through WalMart without another melt down. We came home, ate lunch and now they are in their rooms trying to nap. And here I sit self medicating with a big pile of their Halloween stash. I think they owe it to me.