Girls Gone Wild

WARNING! This is a very long, pointless story.

I don't carry a purse anymore. I carry my wallet, my cell phone and my car keys. Since I almost always have Jake with me I just put all of these things in his diaper bag rather than toting around a purse as well.

Yesterday, Amy and I conned our husbands into watching the kids while we went out for a little girl bonding. It was so much fun! We went to my favorite Mexican restaurant and had some good food and a margarita each. After that, we headed on over to the mall to go to Nordstroms. We had both read about a pair of jeans called The Rocker that were supposed to be just fabulous. So we picked out our jeans and some very hip, modern tops to go with them and went on into the dressing rooms. I may have mentioned before that I am fashionably challenged these days. Even The Rocker's couldn't help me. They were seriously three feet too long. Of course I should have known that by looking at the tag which said they were made for the "sinewy" body type. I am by no means sinewy. Amy is. She looked like a rock star. I just looked like a rock. A short, little, squaty rock. Oh, well. The jeans cost $158 so I wouldn't have bought them anyway. I tried to talk Amy into buying the cute little blue halter top she tried on that made her look very hip, but she just wasn't ready.

After the mall we decided to go look at an open house in Amy's neighborhood because neither one of us was ready to go home. So, we pretended like I was actually looking to buy a home and went and had a look. The house was beautiful and Alex the realtor was very nice.

Finally, we couldn't think of anything else to do so we went back to Amy's house where my car was and I was going to go home. Only I couldn't find my car keys. I was afraid I had locked them in the car but neither one of us could see them in there and I was certain I had them with me when we got into Amy's car. So we searched Amy's car. Amy's husband even came out and helped us look in her car. No keys. We searched her house. No keys. We called the restaurant we had lunch at. No keys. We called Nordstroms. No keys. I even called Alex the nice realtor. No keys. Hmm. Have I mentioned that I am very forgetful these days and can barely complete a sentence much less remember what I did two seconds ago? Well, Amy has the same problem. We used to be like Thelma and Louise when we got together. Now, it's kind of like Thelma and Louise meets Dumb and Dumber.

I called Mike to come pick me up because I couldn't drive home with no keys. He reminded me that he had our baby with him and that I had the car seat in the locked car with me. What to do? I came up with the brilliant plan of having Amy drive me home to pick up Mike and Jake who would follow us back to her house in our other car with the spare set of Jeep keys. But since we still wouldn't have Jake's car seat he would have to ride with Amy in her 2 year old's big boy car seat. It was all very confusing. On our way to my house Amy discovered that the phone book that had been in her car was now missing. She quickly deduced that someone must have broken into her car and stolen the phone book and my car keys. Now we were getting somewhere! Only, why wouldn't they have stolen my cell phone too? It was sitting right beside the phone book and the car keys. Minor details! We knew what had happened. Either someone had burgled my keys and her phone book or we were on candid camera. Except that then I looked down and saw my car keys sitting in a little nook in her car console. Oops. We both felt very stupid. Not as stupid as we felt a few minutes later when I realized that our elaborate plan for getting Mike and Jake and having them follow us to Amy's house with the extra set of keys was completely pointless. Because couldn't I have just gone into the house and gotten the extra keys and gone back with Amy by myself to get the car?! I'm telling you my brain just doesn't work well anymore! But at least I have Amy who is in exactly the same situation. I love her so!

And the whole point of this story which I forgot to mention is that wouldn't things be easier if I just carried a purse with all of my stuff in it?