Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Pour Some Sugar on Me

Last Friday I had to go to a lab to get a three hour gestational diabetes test done. Because I failed the one hour test I took the week before. The same thing happened when I was pregnant with Jake. It seems that my body needs more than one hour to correctly process sugars. Which is surprising to me seeing as how I've made it one of my life's missions to eat as much sugar as possible. You'd think I'd be good at metabolizing the stuff.

Anyway, I went in to take the test at 10:30am after fasting since 10pm the night before. Let me just say there are a few things in life that preggos should not do. Fasting being at the top of that list and wearing thong underwear being also at the top of that list. I wasn't able to eat my regular 2am bowl of cereal the night before or have any breakfast other than water. They say water fills you up, but they lie. I was hungry. And to add insult to injury I had to sit there and drink the most awful tasting orange flavored sugar water concoction to get things started. And they want you to drink it as quickly as possible. I hate the taste of orange soda so this was really hard to swallow. I mean seriously, why don't they make the stuff taste like a chocolate milkshake? Then I would have no problem with it. As it was, I nearly tossed my cookies after drinking the stuff and was rewarded with having my blood drawn four times for the next three hours.

When the sweet lady taking my blood asked me what I was going to do when I left there that day I did not hesitate about saying that I was going straight to McDonald's. I didn't care that I was in there for a possible diabetes diagnosis. I just wanted good old fashioned greasy junk food. Possibly followed by a plateful of brownies or sugar cookies. Unfortunately, my body was not on the same page as my mind. I was only able to eat half of my Quarterpounder meal before I started feeling really sick and had to go lay down for two hours and I really have not been able to eat much since. Is it possible that a 16 hour period of no eating could have shrunk my stomach that much? Or is baby Emma just getting so huge that there is no room in me for food anymore? Either way, I'll be seriously bummed if those test results come back positive and the doctor tries to put me on a restrictive diet two days before Christmas. That just won't work for me. Because room or no room, I plan to ingest several pieces of my mama's chocolate pie, cheerio pie and whatever other kind of pie might be available to me over the next few days. Move over Emma, there's pie on the way.

5 comments:

  1. As a former sufferer of gestational diabetes I pray you do not have it. It is the absolute worst! Keeping my fingers crossed. I will totally be here for you if you do have it though. Luckily I had my sister, who had been through it before.

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  2. Thanks Cathy! I got the results back and it was normal this time. Luckily, I won't have to deal with it.

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  3. That is a great christmas gift from yourself.

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  4. you are so funny! and i totally hear you on the fasting and thong underwear thing. you need to submit some of your writing to a magazine or something. :)

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