Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Lightning, leaks and loveys

So last Wed. morning as we were getting ready for school our house was struck by lightning. It was the loudest thing I've ever heard. The kids and I all started screaming. Above the screams, I realized that something down the hall was hissing at me. It was our AC/heater unit. I didn't smell gas coming from it but I did smell something weird and I was a little freaked out. So I called Mike. He told me to get the kids and get out of the house. So I did.

I took about five minutes to look around the house and decide what I should take out in case our world blew up that morning. I did get the kids-each with a coat and a pair of shoes on although Emma wasn't wearing any pants and it was cold outside. I grabbed Jake's crab and Emma's favorite blanky. I grabbed my rings and I stuffed my laptop into my new Vera Bradley purse. I grabbed the dog but couldn't find the cat. Didn't even think about the lizard. And then for some reason I grabbed Emma's half eaten cereal bar in case we needed to eat after the house blew up.

We left everything in the house exactly as it was and ran for the car. Then I drove down the street and parked so I could watch the house while I called the gas company. The emergency line. They told me someone would be right out. Then they told me to go back in the house and open all the doors and windows. Now, I didn't want to go back in, but I did. I was hoping I could find my cat while I was in there. No luck. She wouldn't come to me and she wasn't in any of her favorite hiding spots. I went back out to the car.

Almost an hour later, the gas guy still hadn't shown up and the kids were getting restless. They wanted to play a game on a device that was still in the house. I debated about two minutes then I ran back in the house to get it. And this time I also found my cat. Finally, we had everything we needed. I wouldn't have to watch our house blow up knowing my kitty was bbq. The lizard was a whole different story. Sorry Scratchy.

So, finally the gas company arrived and decided the house was safe. There was a leak but it wasn't natural gas. It turned out to be freon. We also had some electrical damage and the modem for our computer got fried. We were without internet for 24 hours. That was the longest 24 hours of my life. $400 later everything is repaired and we are back in business. Pretty eventful day after my birthday!

Nothing that a few cuddles from these two can't make better.

My parents came to see us that morning and took me out for dinner that night. These are the two sweetest parents anyone could ask for. Later, Jake was talking to my dad about the morning. He mentioned that I was "vewy cwanky to Emma" during the whole thing. Possibly because Emma decided to throw a fit about putting on her shoes during this whole escapade. She threw herself on the floor and said she couldn't put on her shoes and, in fact, she couldn't even stand up anymore. Because there is no better time to play control games with your mama then during a possible life changing disaster.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Brother/sister conversations

Actual conversation between Jake and Emma Mae coming home from school today. Neither one of our children choose to pronounce the "r" or "l" sound yet. So, I'm typing it the way they spoke it.

Emma: "Jake! I got hit two times today and I did not wike it!"

Jake: "Who hit you Emma?"

Emma: "Zachawy did." "Two times."

Jake: "Well, the next time Zachawy hits you just tell him that he's not being nice and you don't want him to hit you ever, ever, ever again! Tell him your friend Jake said so, and also I'm your brother. And then just tell him to go hit someone else."

Emma: long pause..."Jake! Zachawy can't hit other people either. That's not vewy nice."

Jake: "Emma, you wight. Just tell him to go hit himself next time."

Both kids laughing hysterically.

Jake: "Oh Emma! Tell him to hit himself. That's so funny!"

Emma: "you wight Jake! that is funny!"

Both kids spent the next five minutes laughing while hitting themselves on the head. Why can't I be so easily entertained?

Tuesday, January 24, 2012


Wow. I'm gettin' on up there. Fairly certain I'm going to need bifocals this year too. Sheesh. But, I hear that you're only as old as you feel and most days I feel forty. Tops.

Some nice hubby bought me these pretty roses. He also gave me a nice card and he gave me a separate card from our offspring. On the front it has a mug shot of a cat with the words GUILTY and STALKING on it. Then you open it up and it says "May birthday happiness follow you everywhere...day and night...always there...every freakin' moment." Signed appropriately enough, Jake and Emma.

We started off the day with a trip to Starbucks because anyone who just turned 42 needs a good jolt of caffeine to get going. I bought the kids their very own hot chocolates which they took two sips of and then declared they were done. Oh, no you didn't. When somebody buys you Starbucks, you drink every single drop. They did eat their entire birthday donut with sprinkles though. And I ate every bit of my berry coffee cake and drank every drop of my FREE grande skinny vanilla latte. The skinny part is very important because even though it's my birthday, I'm not gonna go all crazy with calories. Until someone gives me cake.

Don't ask me why Jake has scissors.

I spent the rest of the morning doing laundry and cleaning the bathrooms. Looks like 42 is going to be just as glamorous as 41 was. At the beginning of the year I declared Tuesdays to be bathroom cleaning day. I wish I had had the foresight to look ahead and see what day my birthday fell on this year. I might have declared Thursday to be bathroom cleaning day instead.

By 1pm Emma Mae had approximately 32 emotional meltdowns and ended up having to go to time out. Which may be why Jake never busted out that chocolate cake he was talking up.

Mike had to go straight to school from work so my sweet friend Leslie insisted that I bring the kids over to her house for a home cooked meal. Thank you Leslie! She made yummy fudge pie for dessert.

Don't ask me why I look so surprised. We took fifty pictures before we came up with this one that's barely passable of me.

I got home from dinner and had these lovelies waiting for me on the doorstep. Thank you Papa and Sally!

And last but certainly not least, my sweet hubby brought home my favorite birthday cake for me after school-chocolate bakery cake with white buttercream frosting. And I don't feel at all guilty eating cake on top of pie. All in all I've had a great birthday. Thank you everyone!

Monday, January 23, 2012

the day before 42

Well, I had a relatively good last day of being 41. We went to school/work today and our kids were really good. Then we came home and Jake and Emma were really good. I made sure they both knew that tomorrow is my birthday because I want to make sure we have a good day tomorrow and a little prep never hurts anything. Jake was so sweet and told me the necklace he made for me at school today was actually my birthday present. I bet he was glad his teachers made him make a necklace this morning. He is totally covered now. He also told me that he wanted to buy me a birthday cake tomorrow. He even asked me what kind I want. Then he said "okay, mama. i'll buy you a cake as long as you're good and don't put us in time out." Note to self. Teach Jake about unconditional love and selfless giving.

For her part, Emma Mae promised not to have any emotional breakdowns tomorrow that might result in me yelling/screaming/having a rise in blood pressure or pulling my hair out. We'll see how that goes. When I tucked her in bed tonight she said "mama, I have some bad news." I was all "okay?" and she was all "i left a big mess in the playroom, i got a lot of toys in there." So, I told her that it was okay this one time. I think she was just wanting me to know about the mess tonight so I wouldn't see it first thing in the morning. Such a sweet girl!

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Birthday week 2012

It's here! I declare my birthday week begun! I believe deep in my heart that everyone should celebrate their birthday for a full week. So I will be celebrating until midnight on Saturday. Well, who are we kidding? The odds of my being up at midnight on Saturday are non existent so let's just say 10pm Saturday is when birthday week ends for me.

I started things off with a bang today by making my new favorite breakfast-a poached egg and an english muffin with a nice hot cup of mocha cafe. Who is this person I've become? What happened to pancakes and pop tarts?

Then I hauled the kids off to church and afterwards I used my first birthday coupon of the week-a free small sandwich at Schlotsky's. Love it! I think Mike is going to make me watch football tonight which is not my wish really because the Cowboys aren't playing. However, I'm gonna let it slide because last night I made him watch New Moon with me. And that it two hours that we can never get back. Anyhow, let the birthday festivities begin!

Saturday, January 21, 2012


So I stayed up late a few nights last week and managed to read the entire trilogy of The Hunger Games books. I loved them! I don't think I've been so hooked on a series since the Harry Potter books came out. Well, okay there was also the Twilight series but I had to enjoy those in private because they were just so embarrassing. Although I'm done with the books, I'm still living with Katniss and Peeta in my head.

Speaking of hunger, this is what 40 pounds of chicken looks like.

Turns out 40 pounds of chicken is way more than I thought it would be. Why do we need 40 pounds of chicken, you ask? Well, let me tell you why. We don't. This is where I need to confess something. I have a recently developed problem. I'm currently working on it with my shrink, otherwise known as Amy. Here's the deal. One of the mom's of a child in my class at mother's day out has this blog called Saving with Shellie. I only discovered it a few months ago. I love it. She tracks down all of the good deals of the day and posts them for those of us who don't like to pay full price for anything. I found lots of good deals for Christmas presents. It's a great website and I recommend visiting it. However, it seems to have awakened some sort of beast within me.

First of all, you have to know that I always try to save money. I don't buy expensive clothes. I hardly ever buy clothes at all. We don't eat out much but when we do it's at moderately priced places and I probably have a coupon for the place. And I'm also the girl who will rinse out zip lock baggies and reuse them. Good for the environment and our bank account. That's a win win situation. We are not poor but we have to watch our money. The problem is that ever since I discovered Shellie's website, I've started buying things just because they are a good deal-not necessarily because we need them. Like when I bought myself a Keurig coffee maker that is regularly $149 for $85. Great deal, right? Except that when I bought it I didn't even like drinking coffee. But for $85 plus the cost of those little K-cups you can bet I learned to love it! In fact, I really look forward to my morning cup of coffee now. Then I bought a skin brush because everyone needs one of those, right? My bargain buying has become a problem. And that's why we now have 40 pounds of chicken in our freezer. Last week, she had a deal from Zaycon foods where you buy 40 pounds of boneless, skinless, steroid free chicken breasts and you get it for $1.67/lb. I couldn't resist. So, now we will be eating chicken every night for three months. Got any good recipes? Or any ideas about how to regain my sanity?

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Sorry, it's just a list...

1.) I went to the dentist for the first time in seven years today. Seven years. I was deeply afraid. Guess what? Perfect teeth! I have to thank my parents for living in Hereford, Tx for a few years while I was young. High flouride in the water equals no cavities for me! Plus, I loved, loved, loved my new dentist office-I may go back in six months instead of six years.

2.) It took Jake about 20 minutes to put his toys away tonight. That's twenty minutes that I will never get back. Because I had to supervise the entire thing. Because although I have explained the organization system put in place in his bedroom about 400 times, he forgets it every single night. Frustrating. During all the putting away, he found two pieces of trash. He asked me what he should do with them. I said "how about you throw them in the trash?" He said okay, but first he had to unzip his pj's all the way down to his feet. Then he began looking in the feet of the pj's and even in his underwear. I was all "jake, what are you doing? that's not where the trash goes." Turns out before he could throw away the trash, he had to find his little toy dinosaur that he had stored in his jammies or underwear first. I'm not sure where exactly he located the little guy because I had to leave the room at that point.

3.) I love it when Jake figures something out for the first time and then says "mommy! i'm smart because I have big brains."

4.) Mike started back to school this week. I'm so proud of him. Please pray for my sanity as I am home by myself with the little people more and more.

5.) I have exactly four more days as a 41 year old person. Strangely, I'm okay with that. I have an entire day planned of freebies for my birthday.

6.) You may remember how crushed I was to learn that Rick Springfield was no longer doing the Rick and friends cruises. Well. I discovered a few days ago that instead of a cruise this year they are doing a Rick and friends vacay to Cancun and everyone is staying at Club Med. Fun! How I wish I had $2000 sitting around and nothing to do with it. You can even pay extra to take acting lessons with him! I would totally do that.

7.) We've had some balmy days in the 70's around here this week. Weird having a warm January, but it has made for some glorious days of park fun for the kids.

8.) One last thing. I want to see a movie for my birthday. Possibly all by myself. Should I see Mission Impossible whatever or The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo or the new Sandra Bullock movie? What's the hot ticket these days?

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Princess Em

I am having the hardest time lately getting good pictures of Emma Mae. She's either twirling around so they come out blurry or she's got some surly expression on her face. But I had to try today since she was wearing her new princess skirt. She actually requested that we call her Princess today instead of Emma. And on the occasions when I slipped up and called her by her given name she quickly corrected me and said "Mama! I Princess, not Emma, 'k?" Girl knows what she wants. Of course later I overheard Jake telling her "hey, Princess? I really just want to call you Emma. Would that be okay?" And she said "sure"! For she is a kind and benevolent princess. If only the queen over here had realized it would be that easy to get her to go back to the name she was born with. And look, I know her hair is a mess. We had it up in a ponytail most of the day which was fabulous, but she tore it out for picture time.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Captain Jake

A true Superhero, even in his sleep.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Oh My Goodness

I know everyone thinks their children are adorable, but seriously our children are adorable. I love watching them interact when they're being silly and not fighting. This is from a photo shoot we did just before Christmas. It was one of those deals where they offer you a "Christmas special" of just $14.95 and an hour later you walk out of there with $100 less in your bank account. Gets me every single time.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Emma Mae

You know the moment you realize that it is way too quiet in your house? In this case, we realized that Emma Mae had been very quiet in her room for about half an hour. This is what Miss Thing gets up to when left to her own devices. She stacks things. She organizes. She loves to take all of her little toys out of their baskets and put them into other containers. Or spread them on the floor. Whatever. I see a future for her working at the Container Store or something.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Bringing in the new year

Whew. I'm kind of glad the holiday season is over. I love it, but after six weeks of celebrating various things I'm pooped. Time to get this family back on a good schedule.

I took the kids to Amarillo to visit my parents the day after Christmas. They did really well on the long drive. We ended up staying until New Year's Eve because the heater in our JEEP decided to go AWOL at long last. The last two hours of our drive the heater didn't work at all. It was 22 degrees outside. And it was 22 degrees in our car because not only would the heater not work, but I couldn't turn off the cold air either. The kids were bundled up with their blankets in the back while I was shivering in the front with cold, arctic air blowing in my face. Luckily, the car's seat heaters were working. However, they work too well. You can turn them on for about five minutes before the flesh in your thighs and booty starts to sear. So, to keep warm I turned on the seat heater and sat on my hands alternately for ten minute stretches to keep my core body temperature up. It was lovely. Anyhow, when my daddy found out about the driving conditions he took our JEEP to his mechanic and got it fixed forthwith. Do you watch Blue Bloods? I love the way the cops are always saying "forthwith."

Anyhow, we made it back home on New Year's Eve about 6:30. I was so tired from the week of sleeping in the same room with a thrashing Emma Mae and a sleep talking Jake that I didn't care to even pretend to want to stay up and usher out 2011 or say hello to 2012. We were in bed by 9pm. Unfortunately, that was about the time our neighbors decided to start shooting off fireworks. Really? I guess I understand fireworks at midnight on NYE but three hours of fireworks? Our dog was a mess. He is 130 pounds of pure dog until you start making things go BOOM! Then he quickly turns into a shivering, neurotic chihuahua of a dog. Needless to say, no sleep was to be had until after midnight. Bahumbug.

We spent the first day of 2012 recovering while watching Dora and Diego explore the world. Thanks to Pioneer Woman we had a delightful dinner of drip beef sandwiches and black eyed pea dip. Yum. Later, against my better judgement I decided to watch the Cowboys play for a spot in the playoffs. Oh, Cowboys. You keep breaking my heart. And I just keep coming back to you. Well, no more. I've decided that the next football team that comes along and treats me the way I want to be treated is getting my undivided attention next year. Your tight pants, trick plays and time management skills no longer have a hold on me. I think I'm quitting you. I just hope the next team I decide to back has a cutie patootie quarterback that can lead them to the Super Bowl.