Do you remember the moment as a mommy when you realized you would never have privacy again? I think for me it happened as soon as Jake learned how to crawl. He was always very fast. He followed me everywhere and still does to this day. In fact, what used to be Emma's naptime and his "rest" time in the playroom has turned into Jake being in whatever room I'm in "quietly" playing with his toys or just sitting beside me on the couch reading books. It's sweet but still I crave some alone time. Try explaining that to a four year old. He just looks at me and says "but mama I just want to be with you." And then I melt. And he gets to stay.
I know this won't last forever. I know I should just count my blessings that I finally have these wonderful children. And I do! Still, it is hard for someone who is naturally introverted and self reflective (is that a word?) to have someone around ALL the time. My thoughts need time with my brain.
So anyway, I can't remember the last time I got to have any sort of privacy in the bathroom when the kids were awake. During my showers, Emma is usually in there climbing in and out of the bathtub, getting into all of my bubblebaths and trying to climb onto our window seat above the tub. So there I am washing my hair yelling at her to get down already. And since there is a glass partition between us she feels free to look at me and say "NO."
Then Jake usually comes barreling in. Jake is a force of nature to be reckoned with. Generally, he runs in, leaps into the tub, jumps up and down, does something to make Emma cry and then jumps out of the tub. You see why I want him to wear his bicycle helmet all the time? He is a daredevil. During that part of my shower I usually choose to close my eyes and pray that everything will be okay.
But a couple weeks ago we had an incident that made me feel like a line had been crossed. And it has happened a few times since then. My sweet girl follows me into the bathroom for all occasions. I'll try not to be too graphic here. BUT, I was sitting on the potty. We were having our normal conversation about what I was doing in there and she was telling me all about the toilet paper. Next thing I know she was wiping my bottom with some TP she picked up. It all happened so fast I didn't know what to think! I was all "uh, thanks Em!" She said "you're welcome" and went on her way. Now I know it's not really a big deal. (It's not, is it??) I know she's just curious about the potty and maybe this is a step in the right direction letting me know she's ready for some potty training. But there are just some things I need to do for myself, by myself, and with myself only.
Am I alone out here? Does anyone with little ones feel like you just need a moment? To yourself? In a closet maybe? With some wine? And some toilet paper? Just asking.